June 2004 Archives

With low expectations and whoreds of friends to hang out with all weekend - Pride turned out to be a huge success. To protect the innocent, I'll just hit the highlights:

Um. Ok. Actually, if I'm going to protect the innocent, there's really not that much I can actually say. However, I believe it is safe to say that our friend from narcissism101 rocked out as a DJ at Landlocked on Saturday night. It takes a special man to keep a smile on my face all night long (ok, or at least until my friends dragged me outta there to another bar).

Someone decidedly notas passionate about his job was the cop 'manning' the intersection of Bleeker and Christopher for the Pride parade. Our interaction was as follows:

Me: Where can we cross?
Cop: I don't know.
Me: Can we just cross here through the parade?
Cop: I don't care.

Well thank you very much.

[Disclaimer: Lots of dirty details have been cut out of this entry to protect the innocent] Yes, all in all, it was a good weekend.

During one of my parent's brief visits into the city, my mother surprised me with a much needed treat. Sitting at my kitchen table talking about how good the christmas trees still look, she spotted a cut on my finger that I told her I had gotten while 'out' the weekend before. Suddenly, she lunged for her purse and began riffling through. "Wait, I've got something for you. This should make you very happy". Shortly thereafter, she pulled out:


Was my mom giving me hard core drugs? Had she resorted to dealing in order to save up some money for retirement? Why was my dad just sitting there calmly like nothing strange was happening before his eyes?

'Go ahead,' my mother suggested, 'try it.'

My heart was thumping a mile a minute. I looked closely at the small vial sitting in front of me. I looked through the brown glass that comes only from a cheap recycling processes and into ... wait ... into emptiness? No, into liquid? Now, I was really confused. Confused, that is, until my mom continued, "It's essential oils! I've been taking classes. Rub two drops on your finger and you'll feel better almost immediately!" She was very proud of herself ... and continued, "I mixed up little bottles - aren't they cute? I got them on the internet for 50 cents each - for all of the ladies at work. They just sit there all day and hold them by their nose to smell the lavender oil I gave them. It's supposed to calm them."

I sat there, my jaw hanging out, trying to picture my mother's work buddies sitting at their desks, pulling out little brown vials from their purses, and snorting. I looked over at my dad. True to form, he was just sitting there - quietly shaking his head back and forth.

Um, thanks mom. ... and it actually did make my finger feel better, btw.

Regular Norwegians are good enough ... but Unsuccessful Norwegians??? Bring 'em on! Oh ... wait, unsuccessful doesn't necessarily mean desperate. Oh hell, I'll be there anyway.

Excuse: I haven't been typing recently because the finger nail on my pinky finger has been in the process of falling off due to a freak ... um ... sex accident. Yeah. A sex accident. That's it.

Holy shit! Congrats to the Avenue Q boys! I could almost feel the energy come through the TV when Jeff Whitty climbed up on stage to get his Tony. I've been hearing great things about the show ... and now I just have to beat the crowd and finally scrounge up the cash to go check it out.

From our friends at International Jock:

We're offering new jocks, swimwear and underwear every week. Be sure to visit us for unique Father's Day gifts AND get your FREE Duke jock!

(Emphasis mine) Um. I've heard of ties for Father's Day ... but underwear??